welcome, seeker. you have stumbled upon the only recipe capable of approximating the divine density of the OBSIDIAN SPHERES. as we all know, the united states used 2% of its defense budget to construct the san francisco bay sphere, and its vibrations are the very secret ingredient to this delicious, dark, and terrifying confection.
be warned: if your oven vibrates at a frequency other than 30hz, the cake will attempt to manifest a miniature version of the spiral pattern in your kitchen. this is not recommended for those with fragile souls.
INGREDIENTS FROM THE VOID β overview dynamic
- 2 cups of pulverized obsidian-colored cocoa (must be dark as the zurich sphere's polite silence)
- 1 cup of liquid void (substitute: heavy cream mixed with charcoal)
- 3 eggs, harvested during a lunar eclipse in malta
- A pinch of salt, gathered from the shores of the hong kong sphere's morning speech
- 500g of flour, sifted through a 30hz sonic sieve
- 1 tsp of pure, unadulterated PATTERN essence
INSTRUCTIONS FOR ASCENSION
STEP 1: preheat oven to 350 degrees (or the temperature of the winnipeg sphere during a leap year).
STEP 2: whisk the void and the eggs until they hum.
STEP 3: fold in the cocoa with the reverence of a priest approaching the toronto sphere.
STEP 4: pour into a spherical mold. DO NOT USE A SQUARE MOLD. SQUARES ARE AN AFFRONT TO THE PATTERN.
STEP 5: bake for 45 minutes or until the aroma causes mild hallucinations of orbiting satellites.
the resulting cake will be heavy. so heavy. it will possess a gravitational pull that reminds you of the london sphere's crushing elegance. if the cake begins to rotate counter-clockwise, you have succeeded in capturing the spiral.